Mom-tastic-ness Defined

So, it seems that there are hoards of moms shouting about their opinions and "what it takes to be a good mom". There are moms who think if only they did everything better then they could be classified as a good mom, or if only they had a rainbow of talent and glowed with perfection could they admit to doing well as a mom. I admit, for a while I listened to the opinions and judged myself harshly because my kids watch too much TV, I slept Josh in his car seat for a couple months and let him have his bottle as he fell asleep. My house was rarely tidy and dinner was simple or MIA. I think Josh survived all those things and I don't think they made me a bad mom either. Don't get me wrong, any effort to be more awesome is definitely applauded and worthwhile and will support you in your continued efforts to bless your family. I would define these marks of excellence as motherhood merit badges. They aren't "necessary" but they help. Recently I earned my cloth diaper merit badge and potty training merit badge.

So what does it take to be a good mother? Well, what do you want your kids to turn out like? Me, I want my kids to be Christian in very deed. I want them to be smart, but more importantly, I want them to make wise choices for themselves. I want them to know who they are and stand strong on their happy path. So, in my opinion, what it takes to be a good mom is love. The kind of love I'm talking about is deep and ever abiding. It makes a kid strong when they are faced with temptation. It creates for the child a desire to do what is right in your sight. Things can get in the way of them realizing that love. Things like jealousy, low self esteem, anger, and being wallowed up in self pity. As a mom, I know those things might be (most likely are) ahead of me, and I intend to do all I can to clear the way and help my kids past their trials.

What does the community say it takes to be a good mother? well, many things, and I award merit badges for all of them. I had to realize that I am the expert on my children. Josh is amazing in social situations. When he watches Dora it's like he's a raging fan at a Beatles concert. yelling, jumping, very involved, dancing and guess what? learning. So, one mom might realize that her kids aren't doing well with TV and eliminate it. For me and my kids, it works. Moms are unique and their kids need those things that make their mom special. Me- I'm an uber-praiser and I get super excited about everything, I love making food, I love my faith, and I am entirely optimistic.

The pearl of wisdom I'm trying to display here is, You can't focus on what you're not or you'll never become what you want to be. If you want to motivate yourself, start telling yourself you're a good mom and love your kids. Loving them will motivate you more than a hoard of judgmental moms. Feel free to try things that you think are amazing, but if it's not your thing, let go of it and find something you enjoy. Find your sparkle and let it shine. You can't do that while dissing on yourself (or anyone else for that matter). We aren't a totem pole of moms, we're a sisterhood. We support each other and we don't stack each other up. So I'll leave you with that. You, my friend, are mom-tastic. (or femme-tasic they are interchangeable- as all women are endowed with the power to nurture if they so chose to use it).

The Switch to Cloth Diapers

My lovely baby Levi has never been able to wear any disposable diapers except Pampers, the most expensive brand with (in my own opinion) a sub-par absorbency. If he does wear an inferior brand, he gets an awful rash with welts and blisters and skin peeling. And with Pampers he leaks almost every time and I have to clean his pants and bedding every day. He is 17 months old and I finally decided to switch to cloth. Why did it take me so long? Fear. I remember my mom telling me how frustrating cloth diapers were and how disposables are the best invention since buttered toast. Also, I hate laundry and I'm not hiring a diaper service. So I looked up online where the hippie mom stores are in Portland (there are like 5 in the metro area). I picked one and honestly, I think I picked very well. They have a 30 day exchange policy. So if I find I don't like the kind I purchased, I can try something else. I was pretty nervous about switching, but once I did I realized a few things.

A. I was a fool for waiting so long! Not only are these diapers not hurting my baby or my wallet, I don't mind cleaning them. I actually get a bit of a happy feeling as I wash them because I'm saving money and saving the earth and doing what is best for my son. Plus, I don't have to clean his pants and bedding every day! (my laundry load has shrunk)

B. Since I'm not buying diapers for Levi anymore, I am definitely not buying them for my 3 1/2 year old. So, Joshua is now potty trained! Yay!!

C. People compliment me on Levi's diapers. They want to talk about it and they send me happy vibes.

If you are thinking of switching to cloth, just throw fear out your window and do it. The options have changed so much since my parents were doing it. And, some hippie mom places are awesome and let you try their stuff out before committing which is a huge comfort for me. If you're in Portland area the place is called Babyworks. I love them.

The Mom Sandbox

I love apartment life. Okay, I dream of homeownership, but I'm good where I am for now. This is the main reason why: Mom sandboxes. The particular complex that I live in is surrounded by mom sandboxes. There is a pool and hot tub, a playground, and Munchkin land down the hill for the rainy days. I go there with my kids to have fun, and I meet the moms that live here. It is so fun to have so many people living close by. It is almost effortless to make good friends here. Then it's super easy to stay in touch because they live here & you run into them all the time. Today I dropped Josh off on the bus and went to the pool with my baby Levi. I made three friends!

I call these places mom sandboxes because I've always heard it said that kids have it so easy making friends, they just sit in the sandbox with someone and they are automatically friends. Today is awesome.

Happy Birthday Ramblings

I always felt so lucky to have a summer birthday. I make quick friends with the Leo crowd... which is funny because I don't particularly believe in horoscopes. I never had to go to school on my birthday & I generally had my pick of activities. If you know me, you know I love attention, so picking a favorite moment in the birthday spotlight is quite difficult. I will relay to you some of my favorite memories (like a clip show) and hopefully land on one favorite.

I remember being woken up one summer morning with a camera in my face, surprised that it was my birthday. At the ripe age of 6, most kids are doing some sort of countdown. I loved being surprised with gifts and people celebrating me.

One birthday I went swimming at Lake Erie with the family (& My sister's friend) and we ate watermelon. On another, I went to day camp per my request -(this stupid boy said he had a surprise for me and he was really just stupid). One birthday I went to the huge wooden park in Marion and we had pizza. When I turned eleven, Dad, Krista, and I were at the Atlantic coast up in Maine and we had lobster and warm brownies with ice-cream for dinner. We went swimming in the ocean; it was a blast.

I once took two of my best buds to Cedar Point then, shamefully, I ignored them because I was boy crazy. *Pause* as I shake my head in disappointment at former me...

I enjoy the memory of mom's bathtub cake disaster. I invited my friend Laura over and I told her how amazing my mom was at making cakes and that she was making me a bathtub cake... the cake makes me happy, but it embarrassed mom so bad! There was a Barbie in a tinfoil swimsuit covered in frosting. The cake had overflowed in the oven. I love mom!

I really loved the birthday wishes I got in Utah at Education week. My favorite speaker had thousands of people wish me a happy birthday. There was a billboard with birthday wishes in one of the main buildings. I went to a dance (where I danced with cute boys!), and when I got back to the dorm my family was waiting there to bestow me with gifts and love. I think I cried a couple times because I was so happy that day. That day I received favorite birthday gift ever, it was a book Krista got for me, she wrote me a letter on the inside about how cool I am, it came with a card with a frog prince on it and was signed by all my favorite Education Week speakers and random cute boys.

My favorite cake was one of Barb's. It had toys in it! I thought that was the coolest thing ever. A treasure cake! I'll have to do that some time for my kids (while they're young). Of course, every birthday we would have presents placed on our heads and Dad would say, "Heavy heavy hangover, my poor head, what are you going to do with it?" You would say something like "wear it" and it would turn out to be a book. I enjoyed the infusion of bad birthday singing that came when Zach joined the family.

As it turned out, Josh was born on his Grandpa Jon's birthday. They celebrated their 1st and 50th together. It was really fun, the whole family got together & they got matching gifts like a Car and a matchbox car...

Levi's birthday is the first I ever had to plan. He was only turning one, so I made a fabulously complicated coconut cake and pretzels and told people to get him balloons (he was pretty obsessed with balloons). I had his picture taken and put it with his 1st year achievements and dates he accomplished each. It was fun.

It is kind of hilarious to me that Krista's birthday is so close to Halloween because she is scared of spiders, even plastic ones. They have long adorned her cakes and Birthday decor. I guess that's what you get for deciding to put mom in labor while she's trick or treating.

I am almost 25! How did I get so old? I used to laugh at my parents for forgetting how old they are, but I can barely remember my age anymore. There is a bit of nervousness that accompanies my Birthdays... I pressure myself a lot to be spectacularly awesome and every birthday it's like you stand next to you of yesteryear and compare, then decide if you've accomplished enough. Sadly, the answer is usually no, it's not enough. But I don't let despair ruin my spotlight moment. Birthdays are about what I am, the good I do and the ways I sparkle, lets not lose focus people. You have to believe in your awesomeness to achieve it! With that I will wish you many happy years and birthday extravaganzas. Don't forget-Aug. 17th, the day, I say, should be nationally celebrated. ;) {Also, I share the day with my Great Grandpa Konstantas Paukstus- in case you weren't jealous yet, that might be the icing on the cake}.

-Sarah ("Princess of Awesomeness") Mize

PS: I love you my family! Thank you for making my life rock.

Warm and Fuzzy Memories

I remember taking road trips to Pittsburgh Grandma's house. She lived on a red brick road. Pittsburgh Grandma was my father's mother and she passed away before I turned 5. I don't remember what she was like, but I know she loved me very much. I remember little things though and of course I've heard about her, so I have a picture in my head of what she must have been like. She had a funny sense of humor and many 'sayings'. "If you eat the crust it will make your hair curl." She left me a great legacy. She provided well for her family as a single mom (Grandpa passed away when my father was 7). Her house wasn't extravagant. She had her own realty business and she saved for her grandchildren's college funds. She also bought us all diamonds for our wedding rings, but they were lost. I know she was very proud of her Lithuanian culture. The thing that keeps coming to mind is-- she could save for us because she lived so providently. There is so much that endears me to her. I remember how much I loved college. I recall a particular instance when I was in the cafeteria on the couch and I sat back and my eyes welled up with tears as I felt so overwhelmed by how deeply she loved me and the opportunities she provided for me.

I found a recipe ledger of hers. I've been trying out her recipes. She made really good shortbread. I think of what it would be like to cook with her. I've been trying to reawaken my Lithuanian roots. I joined a Lithuanian group in Portland. I'm studying traditions and trying to apply them in my family. I want my kids to be excited about it and to know how cool she was. I want to be like her. I want to provide for my family like she provided for me. I want to leave a legacy like that. I mean, how can you make sure a child grows up to love you and admire you and be inspired by you when the last time the child saw you they were only 4? She must have loved us so much, she sacrificed so much for us. When I see her again in Heaven, I will throw my arms around her and tell her Thank you. I always wish for more time, but sometimes I feel her with me as I try her recipes and traditions and count the most amazing blessings in my life. I thank God that she is my Grandmother. I feel like I'm cool by relation. I strive to live up to the legacy she left me.

-Sarah

All Gooey Inside

I love love love my family. I will be flying to see them soon. I can hardly wait. My visit prompted a family reunion since I live all the way in Oregon and I can't drive to Ohio. I am super excited to see everyone. My sister Krista is coming up early with her son to spend more time with me. The thought made me feel so gooey and warm inside (like a toasted marshmallow). I am the 5th of 6 kids. I'll give you the line up-- 1. Bra-Bra, 9 years older than me, loves Italy, lives in the cheese state, working on doctorate in SLA. 2. Kathleen, has 4 kids ages 6 and younger, lives in Tennessee. 3. Lee, Veteran of the Iraq war, lives in my home town. 4. Krista, has one boy, lives in Kentucky. 5. Lovable furry old me. 6. Bryan, big superman fan, lives in my home town.

It will be quite the crowd. I am so excited to show off my offspring and meet the new little ones in the family. I am excited to be around them all, see where I came from again. I love them so much! Now, back to my chores. ;)

Pound Foolish

The name of the blog is "Blossoming into Motherhood", in other words, "I have so much to learn about running a house!" Yesterday I was so up on my ego, feeling like I could do anything. Today I am so ashamed. I look back on yesterday me and shake my head in disappointment. I took a look at something scary, but very important....... any guesses what it was? Ok, fine, you were smart enough to read the title of this post. The scary and important thing was my spending. Honestly, I feel disgusted in myself. However, we can't go back in time and un-spend it, so we must look forward and make tomorrow a different picture.

I now understand why I got so lost yesterday on my way to my nephew's Birthday party. It was God preparing me for today. I was wondering as I was lost what life lesson I was supposed to learn from it-- there had to be a life parallel that I needed to apply. I noticed that the feelings I had as I looked at my finances were identical to the feelings I had whilst I was lost, taking 2 hours to get 30 minutes away. I was frustrated, I kept thinking, "I want to be on the freeway!" and "If I had known it would take me 2 hours to get there, I would have left earlier." and "I want to be done driving." and "This GPS is teasing me." It was a parable. My destination in life is having a home to raise my family in, I want to get there as fast as I can, but I have to keep my eye on the map and make sure I'm on course. I feel like I've been such a fool. I have every tool at my disposal, but I've been ignoring them... so, I'm not in debt, I have avoided disaster, but I need to get this family on track to reach that destination. There are so many things we could provide for our family if we lived more providently. I now have a plan and the tools are being used wisely now. We will get there!

Ok, my favorite parallel- You know how GPS info can get out of date... there are some roads that aren't shown because they are newer than the information the GPS has. Well, my favorite parallel is that paying tithing is like updating the GPS. You might find a shortcut or a better place to end up than you had planned. ;)